“Eureka!” -Archimedes

My roommate Bryon was a clever, business-orientated man, but often came up with ridiculous schemes to make money. I can’t remember all of them all but they included:

-Divorce friendly housing (how would that even work?)

-A dirt removal by summer and snow removal by winter business (hardly original)

-A new political party (with today’s toxic polarization I’m relieved we never did that)

I don’t fault him for thinking big, or outside of the box. Once I came up with the idea of clear coloured coffee… the idea being it wouldn’t blacken your teeth or leave a stain on your clothes. It’s been put into practice since then I think, though I doubt the inventor is as rich as Elon Musk.

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Anyway, one day I was in my study (okay at my desk downstairs), working on a history paper. Most likely it was on the Middle East, which was my focus at the time. When I get into what’s known as a writer’s high I become singleminded and passionate. It’s better than being high, drunk, or even sex. Needless to say, I wasn’t pleased when Bryon disrupted my state of enlightened bliss.

I heard the TV remote hit the floor upstairs, followed by my roommate yelling out “THAT’S IT!” At that point I mumbled to myself “not this again.” This was followed by loud stomping noises as Bryon ran towards the basement, burst open the door, and rushed downstairs. As he did this he kept repeating “Andrew, Andrew, Andrew…”

Not bothering to hide my discontent I said “what is it Bryon, I’m very busy?” Still excited by his divine revelation he said “we should open a bar called The Saloon!” I was tempted to just tell him to go back upstairs and leave me in peace. But I remembered the name of a bar that existed in our city.

“Bryon,” I said with annoyance” we already have the Whiskey Saloon, it’s literally 5 minutes away!” At this point he wasn’t deflated, or even upset. He just stopped in his tracks and said “oh…” Then he unceremoniously went back upstairs to watch TV. 

With hindsight he was probably drunk, high, or both. Either way, it didn’t matter. Such things happened at least ONCE A MONTH!