“Did you fall asleep, or did you pass out?” -Eric “Ah ha ha ha ha, SHUT UP!” -Billy Madison I don’t discuss my sex life. Mostly because it’s personal, no one else’s business, and not a classy thing to do. Much like bartending and war, sex is often boring, sometimes terrifying, occasionally exciting, and often just…

“Eureka!” -Archimedes My roommate Bryon was a clever, business-orientated man, but often came up with ridiculous schemes to make money. I can’t remember all of them all but they included: -Divorce friendly housing (how would that even work?) -A dirt removal by summer and snow removal by winter business (hardly original) -A new political party…

“She came, she saw, she dropped her skirt.”  I’ve said it before… most bartenders aren’t pursued by the girls they want. There’s exceptions like the best looking guys who work at the most popular bars. But most work at boring and average bars. There’s nothing wrong with that, just don’t expect to get many Kylee…

“It’s like I always say, you get more with a kind word and a two-by-four than with just a kind word.” -Marcus Cole, Babylon 5 Young men can be such drunken assholes! I don’t mean to pick on any group, bartenders deal with violent pricks from all age brackets. The difference is 19-25 year olds…

Junior was a decent, but typical angry cook at a middle class restaurant. I liked him and we never had an issue. He had five kids and three jobs just to support them. He loved them but Junior occasionally had meltdowns over usual nonsense restaurants suffer. He once went ape over a Facebook group for…

“You’re not in the bar or restaurant business; you’re in the people business.” -Jon Taffer You’ll rarely be treated better by an employer than during the hiring process. Like a first date, initial impressions matter and restaurants should want you to like them. If you aren’t given respect and they’re cold and disorganized, you won’t…